We each have moments that we want to happen, but never do anything to ensure that they do. We forget that we play a part in our own lives and instead leave it up to chance. And then we are left with a handful of disappointment and wonder why it turned out the way it did. We spend time constructing our vision for our futures but neglect to fully understand our role when the time comes to take action. We shrug off the responsibility, makes excuses that sound good, and do our best to get through the moment unscathed.
Our sighs becoming heavier.
Our motivation becomes less.
Our feeling alive is but extinct.
Several years ago, someone gave me a comic strip from Sunday’s paper that included the Peanuts gang. Of course, Charlie Brown, the eternal pessimist was visiting the trusted Lucy at her “psychiatry stand”, hoping this his five cents would answer the question he had longed waited to ask would finally be resolved. And Lucy torments Charlie Brown with simple questions that have even easier answers and the conclusion comes to her yelling at him (in true Lucy form) that since his life wasn’t over that he had better start living.
She reminded him that “life is in session.”
Simple enough, right?
How hard is it to live your life?
For some, it is a no-brainer. For others, it is scary and even a half a step forward feels like taking two steps backwards. Most of us fall in the middle somewhere. We move forward with some hesitation and possible anxiousness.
This year, I have decided to challenge myself more than I ever before. I am tired of talking about something and never doing it. Or even worse…running out of time so that I never can do it. For years, I never knew what a “regret” felt like — I didn’t imagine not doing something, because there was nothing to miss. I kept my heart protected and safe from ever possibly being shown and when it snuck out, I quickly shut it down and “regretted” allowing others to see it. I am a prideful woman who believed for a long time that safety and cautiousness were the way to live, never realizing just how much I was missing.
Being a women entrepreneur, I know how frightening creating something from scratch with no guarantees can be. One of my friends who also owns her own business will tell people what she wants but if someone suggests that she go bigger, that is when she starts back pedaling. Seriously. She is like the Road Runner — she bolts. She starts talking herself out of everything and her confidence that she just showed a few minutes ago disguised as excitement begins to disappear. Reminding herself of where she wants to be because she has decided what she is ready for and what she isn’t.
But the truth is, where are never really ready. We think we are. We can close our eyes and throw our hands up and even pray.
But what happens when we draw a line in the sand? How many of us have said to ourselves, “Oh, I will work out on Monday — it is the start of the week” only to never be definitive as to which Monday. How many of us have chickened out asking someone out on a date or sharing our feelings because we convince ourselves that we will do it the “next” time we see them. So we move the line in the sand over and over. We erase it and cover it up and make another one farther down our path, somehow believing that we will be ready when we get there. Then the whole process repeats itself.
Life is not just about drawing the line. We an wish, dream, hope, and even think about the way we want things to be different. And that is all good. BUT all of that still changes nothing. We actually have to cross that line. The line of no return. The line that is no longer in front of us, but now behind us. That line is not just a one-time thing. It is something that we continually draw and step over time and again. It is how we challenge ourselves every day.
Life is in session, people. Right now. There is no time to wait to decide if you are ready or not. No words will provide you the kind of comfort you need to feel comfortable with taking that first step. The past the line. But you must take it. That line cannot be so easily manipulated to ensure our safety from living. Life is an adventure — some steps we will take and wish we never had and others we will feel pushed into and will love every minute of them.
How will you live your life? Will you keep moving that line, so you never cross it? So that you never challenge yourself to answer those questions that only you hear? So that you are filled with regret later on, knowing how many chances you missed and didn’t take? So that you miss out on living your BEST life?
It’s not worth it. To lose a life so valuable and yet never used to its full potential. Life is in session. It might cost you more than a nickel, but I promise that it will be the best money you ever spend.
Michelle A. Homme 2015 ©
