Nothing breaks my heart more than seeing people who settle. They just accept what is in front of them, even if it is not what they truly want. Or they feel stuck – with no possible way out. There should be no “stuck” in someone’s vocabulary and everyone should always feel that there is always something different to have. All it means when I see “The Rut” or the sense of hopelessness in someone is that it is easier to stay than to fight for something better, for something different. I cannot even fathom the amount of courage it takes a battered mother of small kids to leave with nothing to her name – not a suitcase with clothes in it for her kids; no paperwork to assist in getting help from agencies; not a photograph of the memories that will only live in her mind. NOTHING. I have seen this and it tore me up and still does. NO ONE IS STUCK – EVER. There are always choices to be made, even if they are hard ones. Even if you know it will get worse before it gets better. Don’t settle for some life that makes you unhappy. Find a reason to laugh again…to love again…to be you again. Everyone is here once and again, but no one can live here. It is unproductive and self-sabotaging. You are going to have challenges and every challenge is meant to teach you something. Even if it is to find out what you are willing to accept vs. what you are willing to go after. One of the very first sayings I found when I started this trek along the road of life is “You will never change your life until you change your choices.” Do you want to live another life? Even one that is unconventional in other’s eyes? Where they just don’t see what you are seeing? Who do you live your life for? How many of you said, “I live my life for me.”? I am sure, not many. Why not? Even when we feel like there is no way out, that there is no one there to help me, make small changes to get “unstuck” and out of the rut. If this is you…then I ache for you. No one should live a life feeling like there is no way out. Believe me…I know someone who probably thought that for a long time. She could not see the light at the end of the tunnel…not even sure where that light was shining from or what direction it would take her. But I bet if you asked her, she would tell you that she no longer feels stuck and is actually making a new road to travel. “Live your life!” as Lucy tells Charlie Brown in a recent comic strip from the newspaper. Every time you want to give up because it is hard and you are unsure, think about a woman leaving everything behind because leaving with nothing but her two kids because staying is worse. Being stuck is worse. Get out if you are unhappy. It starts with you. Always.
Michelle Homme 2011 ©
