Ever made a mistake?  Ever wish you could do something over?  Yeah…me, too.  But I can’t change what happened in the past and when I have chosen something and made a decision, it is only after that decision has been made that I feel like something was a mistake.  I aim for perfection but that is a delusion because perfection can never be achieved.  And yet, I still keep trying.  Even if it means I make mistakes in the middle of it all.  And that is when I regret.  And then I run.  But there have been times when I have felt uncomfortable and could have done what’s easy…go back to what I used to do, but I can’t do that. So I live with no regrets and do not run.   It is scary and difficult to show hidden sides of yourself and admit things that you hope no one sees.  But that is true about life too.  We are going to say the wrong thing at the wrong time and the best of intentions can still end with disastrous results.    And then we just look back and wish we could have that moment back again to make it better.  But those moments never return.  Perhaps, you get a chance to make it better with actions or words.  Maybe you never get that chance again.  But you try anyway.  You go places that terrify you because you hope for the best and are afraid of the worst.   But doing nothing changes nothing.  Having feelings and sharing them honestly is the only way to truly try to make it better.  It is better than doing nothing.  It is easier to do nothing.  Does that mean you have forgotten or just that it wasn’t worth enough to try?   I was recently in a situation that made me feel uncomfortable with a friend and I could have retreated but I also believe she didn’t mean to make me feel that way.  That is not her problem.  It was mine, but in my sharing that with her, I also knew I was stronger for admitting that to her.   I have to keep trying, even when I make mistakes.  I know I will make them and apologize when I think I have the slightest inkling that I might have hurt someone else that I care about.  Some will say that I apologize when maybe I shouldn’t.  But it means I care more than I should.  It means I forgive more than others would. It means I love more than most.  I read a quote once that summed it up this way…the ones that give the most of themselves, hurt the most.  Why? Because they take chances and when anyone takes a chance, there are also chances that mistakes will be made.  But I think taking chances and making mistakes, even if it mean living with regrets, means I am trying and is always better than doing nothing, absolutely nothing at all.   Keep trying because your best days are just ahead…“My Best Days are Ahead of Me” by Danny Gokey

Michelle A. Homme 2013 ©