Finding my nerve

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This week has been trying but freeing all at the same time.  I found it most amazing how empowered I felt after I could be silent no more.  I did not ask for this, but the second time it comes around, it gets your attention.  Telling myself that I had to do something — regardless if something results from it or not — comforted me and my heart is not torn any longer.  Doing what is right takes courage, but what motivated me more than anything was when I thought, “NO…this does not end this way.”  Now, wearing my “Wonder Woman” underwear might have helped with the courage I needed that day, and I did that on purpose.  How strong do we feel when we have words behind us, cheering us on?  When our conscious is not letting us waver from this opportunity to do something about it?  At the time, we feel isolated and humiliated.  We don’t think anyone will ever believe us.  So, we stay quiet and let it pass away silently and we hope that this is the end of it.  Well, that was not the case these past few weeks.  It reared its ugly head once more and because I could not allow this to happen to anyone else, I spoke up.  It was not going to get the best of me again and if I had any say about it, it wasn’t going to get the best of anyone else either…  No one is going to give you the voice you need to speak up — you are going to just take it.  And it may not be the “right” time, and some people are going to wish you walked away.  Ever had a moment when you had to fight for something that is right?  What did you do while you were in that moment?  Did you run?  Did you stand there and watch it happen?  Did you think that it didn’t involve you?   I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.  – Nelson Mandela  Inadvertently, when we say, “NO!”, we create such strength and fuel the momentum so that fear disappears.  It no longer holds us back, and the seeking of justice begins to be our only motive.  (Wow, I sound like a super hero.)  We all come to points in our lives when we will need to pick right over easy.  And the times that we regret most are the ones when we pick easy over right.  Think about what could’ve changed if you had only done something.  The worst is knowing something and doing nothing about it.  Well, this week, I found my nerve.  I had never lost it, but this week, my MOXIE got turned up a notch and now I know I don’t regret any of it.  You will give other people courage to do the same thing.  And then we are not standing alone.  We stand together.  When those moments come into your life and you have to choose, remember that “Born For This” by Mandisa

Michelle A. Homme 2013 ©

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