There’s a tough question for you…but can you answer it? Or more importantly, would you want to know? Some people don’t want to admit who they are. There are all kinds of personality tests that will tell you why you like the color blue and how your birth order and zodiac sign play into who you are. Maybe you are into the psychic readings and tarot cards too. Ever lied about who you are on a personality test just so you look better on person that who you really are? What does that say about you? And you know what…hiding that on a test will not be your biggest problem because later on, the “real” you will surface anyway. You can’t deny who you are.
There are some tests that ask you to use five words to describe yourself and then to ask five friends to do the same. If your answers are not the same, then that should tell you who you think you are and who your friends think you are. What would that tell you? Maybe you want to be someone who is different from how your friends see you?
Ever seen the movie, “Grease” with John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John? When Sandy and Danny are reacquainted at the local drive in, Sandy is disappointed that Danny acts very cool around his friends, which is very different from the boy she met over the summer.
Truthfully, I don’t read too much into that stuff because I don’t believe in the moon and stars and their “supposed” role into how we live, what we believe, and who we become. I believe that everyone still has free will to have a say in what we do. I know when I am straying from who I am and when I am in a situation where it would be very human for me to be angry and spiteful, I just can’t. I don’t know how and even if I do show that, it never lasts. Because it is not who I am. I can choose what I react to and how I react to it. When I was describing a situation to a friend where someone people would be pissed off, she said, “But that’s not you.” Even she knows…
Why are we the way we are?
Some people come from horrible circumstances and you would never know it. They aren’t bitter or angry about the situations they have dealt with in their past — they accept them for what they are and have used them to be who they are. Some people just can’t let go and they play the “blame” game — the one where they tell people how their lives would be different in “this and that hadn’t happened to them.” Know anyone like that? But you know what…we are only one or the other. We can’t be both. You either live in the past or live in the present. You can explain to me what happened in your past that had some impact on you in some fashion, but that doesn’t mean you get an all-out excuse to be a jerk. No one gets that. If you are bitter and feel guilty about something, taking it out on others never takes that away from being something YOU need to deal with. It never will. And what you create instead is animosity, confrontation, and bitterness. No one wants to be around someone who acts that way.
Didn’t you have a part in your life?
We all have choices that we have made that we wish we could undo. So instead, we learn what to do next time and those choices mold us again into who we are. The choices we make represent our character and show people who we are. But we always have choices…even if we think we don’t. Even if we grew up in a house that encouraged good grades, did it guarantee that we would get good grades? Are there kids that get caught up in the wrong crowd with drugs and alcohol that come from poor families and rich families? Are there kids that come from the most difficult of circumstances that still find a way to make something of themselves? So, what’s the difference? CHOICES! FREE WILL!
No horoscope commanded this child’s future. No birth order decided which child will be successful and which will not. Sure, there are some behaviors that are learned because of these things, but nothing is guaranteed.
Most people will admit it when they believe that the qualities they possess are the ones that society want them to have. But they like to hide or diminish the ones that people would not approve of most days. Who are you? When was the last time you took a long look at who you are and asked yourself to be better than you were? We all have room for improvement. We all have choices that we can make every single day. We choose to be happy. We choose to have a good attitude. We choose to accept that we have a flat tire — we fix it, and move on.
If you could hear how people describe you, would you be glad at what was said or would it upset you? If you don’t know who you are, how do you expect others to know who you are?
Find out who you are: Write down five words that you believe describe yourself and us friends to do the same. Ask for their complete honesty and they can submit their answers anonymously if needed. You learn about not only who you are but maybe it tells you who you want to be. And in order for you to make that change, you have to change it. Don’t believe that because you were born under the Capricorn Moon that you have to be a certain way. Just because you parents divorced or one of your parents died, that you have to be a certain way. So what if you grew up poor? You can still decide to be caring, loving, and giving. You know who you are.
You are not destined to live any other life than the one you choose to live. Never use excuses that were created in your past to design your future.
Michelle A. Homme 2014 ©
