Sometimes, life is just hard
Without notice, our life can take a 180 turn.
It rips the rug out from underneath us.
While we are still trying to figure out what just happened,
it lands a one-two punch.
Knocking us over.
Leaving us bleeding.
Full of confusion.
Creating a stress we have not yet experienced.
But it happens.
To all of us.
We must respond
No matter what it is, we can’t just ignore this.
It is right at us.
Our gazes are locked onto one another.
Nope.
We can’t run.
Hiding won’t work either.
Mustering the strength to stand tall is huge.
Even just getting out of bed feels like a chore.
Feeling dizzy.
Losing our grip on reality as we once knew it.
Wondering what step to take next…praying it is the right one.
Afraid to ask for help from anyone.
Moments make us
I don’t like these moments, but they remind us to look deep within ourselves.
To do things we otherwise would not have chosen to do.
When life happens to “bring it,” focus on doing these 5 things every day:
Be honest with yourself
Denying what you are dealing with doesn’t help you get through it. Face it. Head on. Allow yourself to feel what you feel. Whether it is anger, sorrow and everything in between. Finding honesty — even if its ugly — will give you the greatest sense of growth when you look back at this moment. You may have to uncover a few layers to truly find what you have buried for so long, but giving yourself permission to be vulnerable and incredibly raw will teach you more about who you really are.
Make time for doing nothing
It can be easy to do everything you know needs to get done, but you also need to just be still. Find the quiet. Sit at a park and just close your eyes as the world swirls around you. Have a beer on your back deck and listen to the sound of the wind and the swirling of the leaves as the wind pushes them through the air. Remove yourself from social media and turn off the phone. Avoid answering every text. You need to take time for you.
Don’t ignore your tribe
We all have those chosen few who keep us calm when we want to scream. The ones who know us best. It is easy to just want to curl up in a ball or climb down into that rabbit hole. However, our closest friends have made promises to be there — no matter what life brings. You are there for them when they need you (as hard as it is to accept it) just as they are there for you. (You could do this alone…BUT WHY?)
Process what is directly in front of you
When we are feeling like we are stuck in a storm, we can try to plan for everything. But that’s a pretty big order. Deal with what you must. The other stuff will trickle its way in when it will. Do not let the unknown make something bigger than it already is and don’t try to plan out every scenario. That is a HUGE waste of time and energy. Do what must be done.
Stay positive
When it feels like the world is falling apart and you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, it can be easy to fall into despair. To write off everything you want to believe and pretend it all doesn’t matter. Look forward to good things — the ones just beyond the horizon. Keep a strong mindset. Focus on the good stuff and let the rest just fall away.
We cannot control life
No matter who we are, life cannot be controlled.
The wife of the oncologist will get a cancer diagnosis that will change their lives forever.
Someone you thought would always be there is now just a blur.
A small decision becomes something that changes you forever.
Life is going to happen.
We must decide how we respond and what actions we take.
Remind yourself what you want.
Work towards that goal every day.
Listen to music that is full of meaning and more.
Do fun things like eating dessert first when you are out for dinner, go climb on the playground equipment at the local park, or buy yourself something frivolous without guilt.
Falling apart isn’t something we will avoid as we move through life.
It’s how we pick ourselves up that matters most.
Never forget that…EVER.
Michelle A. Homme 2017
